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John Porter is a founding partner at Oasis Asset Management, contributing writer at OutSFL, and an aspiring novelist. He has worked as a community organizer, political strategist, campaign director, and has volunteered and held leadership positions for a variety of community non-profits. His work approaches serious subjects with curiosity, irreverence, and a sense of humor. Join him daily on Threads @johnporter13
The advice offered in this column is intended for informational purposes only. Use of this column is not intended to replace or substitute any financial, medical, legal, or other professional advice.
I have a good job, I stay in shape, I’m active, I have a good circle of friends, I don’t think I’m ugly, but I get dumped a lot. I don’t know what I’m doing wrong, but I’ve been through all the apps and I feel so depressed. Am I ever going to find my person? I have gone through so many first dates, one-night stands and being ghosted, and it’s exhausting.
I think that my husband has internalized homophobia, but I don’t really know what to do about it.
I met this guy, and we have been hooking up for a while.
If my boyfriend doesn’t make me cum, should I stay with him?
I’m a gay man. I have been out since my early 20s.
Hi John, what advice would you give to meet friends? I’ve never been so lonely in my life. Depression is setting in. Thank you, John, for any help you can provide.
My girlfriend and I have had a few threesomes with other women. All of my friends are jealous because she is so open-minded, but now she wants a threesome with another dude. I’m not into that. She’s bisexual. I’m not. Am I being selfish for resisting? Or is she wrong for pushing this on me?
I’m a straight girl dating a guy. Recently, he told me he wants to be pegged. I don’t want to sex shame him, and I’m open to the idea, but now I’m worried he’s gay and just in the closet. Should I encourage him to explore with other guys just to be sure? How can I know for sure he’s straight now?
I have been married to my husband for nearly 20 years now and as you might think things have gone a little stale, but that’s not why I’m writing.
I was invited to a wedding for a family member, but my mother wasn’t invited. I want to attend, but I’m afraid if my mother finds out that she will be crushed.
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