I was born and raised in Fort Lauderdale, Florida — sheltered, bookish, and without the language to describe what I felt inside. As a kid, I always played the “dad” when my sister and I played house. I didn’t know why — I just knew bows and dresses weren’t for me. I wanted cornrows, Jordans, and basketball shorts. Eventually, people called me a tomboy. Still, I didn’t yet know what LGBTQ meant.
By high school, I understood I liked girls, and I was terrified. A freshman, barely 75 pounds, just learning what “gay” was — and realizing I was one of them. I kept to myself. When college didn’t feel right, I moved to Atlanta at 18, searching for community. Atlanta was a revelation: my first drag queen, my first trans friends. It’s where I met Buddy, who said, “I’m FTM, and I think you are too.” I started binding. I already looked like a teenage boy. For the first time, I felt seen.
After returning to Florida, I joined the Army, served in Germany, and traveled Europe freely as my authentic self. My identity was never an issue among fellow soldiers. But after sustaining a severe shoulder injury saving another soldier, I was medically discharged in 2014.
Through the VA, I learned I could medically transition. I started testosterone in 2015 and told my mom — who remembered Buddy from years earlier. At first shocked, she asked for information. My sister accepted me easily. My dad was the hardest to tell — but his response stunned me. After reading my letter, he texted: “I’m updating my will. What’s your full name now?” He took it better than anyone.
I always looked up to my dad and granddad — their suits, manners, presence. I wanted to be like them. Now, 10 years into my transition, I’m a barber who loves suits, ties, and driving my wife everywhere. I became the man they could be proud of. My family didn’t lose a daughter — they watched me become who I always was. As my niece once said: “You were just a caterpillar becoming a boy butterfly.”
Zahne Williams is a transgender community case worker at The Pride Center at Equality Park and Mr. Trans Extravaganza title holder through The McKenzie Project Inc. pageant. Born and raised in Ft. Lauderdale, Florida he has been working in advocacy and community for almost five years helping those who may need housing, name/gender marker changes, or job placement.
