Misty Alicea has had a relationship with her body image that’s been shaped profoundly by her experiences as a transgender woman. She recalls feeling constrained by societal expectations placed on her at birth, which never aligned with her true self.
“Growing up, I felt trapped by the rigid expectations for being assigned male at birth. I was constantly told to look, act, and present myself in a certain way — ways that never matched who I knew myself to be,” said Misty, who goes by Misty Eyez professionally.
A struggle with gender dysphoria and societal standards marked Misty’s journey. She remembers feeling that her physicality — being “too old, too tall, too big, too manly”—was at odds with her identity.
She initially tried to cope by performing in drag, thinking it might satisfy her need for authenticity.
“Being a diva by night could never fill the void of living in my truth full-time,” she said.
It wasn’t until she began her transition that she started to redefine beauty on her own terms. Despite not fitting into conventional standards of womanhood, Misty embraced her unique form.
“Standing over six feet tall and weighing more than 200 pounds, I’ve never fit the narrow confines of societal norms for womanhood, and that’s okay,” she said.
Her experience in the LGBTQ+ community further highlighted the challenges she faced. The “No Fats, No Fems” culture within the gay community led to experiences of rejection and discrimination.
Yet, Misty found empowerment in embracing her uniqueness.
“My body may not be what society or even the LGBTQ+ community places on a pedestal, but I’ve realized that my worth, my beauty, and my femininity are not defined by anyone else’s standards,” said Misty.
Misty’s journey towards self-love has been transformative. She recounts a period of struggling with her body image but eventually embraced a more compassionate view of herself.
“Looking in the mirror wasn’t always easy — it took time to see myself with love and positivity instead of disgust or resentment,” she said.
Her philosophy on body positivity is about freeing oneself from societal shame and stepping into a space of radical self-love.
“My body, just as it is right now this second, is worthy of love, pleasure, desire, and admiration. It is a body worthy of worship,” she said.
Misty emphasizes that one should not wait for future changes to start loving themselves.
“Don’t wait to be skinny, or ‘perfect,’ or ‘complete’ to start living and enjoying life. Loving yourself today doesn’t mean you won’t want to improve or modify yourself tomorrow. It means you know you are deserving of love and respect at every stage of your journey.”
She encourages people to practice radical self-love and surround themselves with supportive individuals.
“Practice radical self-love. Start with small acts of kindness toward yourself — whether that’s speaking gently to yourself in the mirror or taking time to honor your body through movement, self-care, or dressing in ways that make you feel beautiful and empowered,” Misty said.
Misty’s journey, which includes working in South Florida’s nightclubs, has led her to understand that society should not dictate her happiness or self-worth.
“The more I learned to love myself, the more I stopped giving power to outside opinions, and the more I began embracing the fact that I am enough exactly as I am,” Misty said. “Confidence doesn’t come from fitting society’s standards; it comes from within.”
Misty “Eyez” Alicea is 48 years old. She graduated in May 2024 with a dual MBA and MHA from FAU’s Executive School of Business. She is the Director of Transgender Services and Community Advocate at SunServe, a nonprofit in Wilton Manors.
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This story is for OutFAU, our student publication covering Florida Atlantic University. To see more from OutFAU click here.
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