A scapegoat is a person blamed for the mistake of others. Its source is the Bible.
My friend, Anthony, is being blamed by some for the destruction of USAID. It was his assignment to educate embassy personnel across Africa, and elsewhere, about LGBTQ issues. He’s done an extraordinary job as a gay ambassador.
“This is not about you,” I told him. “If it wasn’t your gay and transgender educational successes, it would be someone else they’d blamed. You did nothing wrong. I think it could be the best thing to happen to you. Savor your successes and move on.”
Anthony was being scapegoated by people inside and outside of USAID. Transgender people are now getting hit by both sides, too. Trump and Musk, and Project 2025, want them to disappear forever. Many gay men, among others, blame transgender leaders for Kamala’s loss. “He, him, his…what’s that?” “Why’d they push the transgender athlete issue?” “Kids transitioning in grade school?”
A good friend is so upset with the acquiescence of Caitlin Jenner that he’s now calling her “Bruce.” “She wants it designated on her diver’s license that she’s ‘male,’ then let her be male.”
Some people scapegoat others with a political agenda. Others do it out of fear. “It’s your fault we lost.” Had Kamala Harris won, no one would be blaming transgender people, or the pandering of the left to any new liberal cause that comes up. There. You see it? I just scapegoated the Democratic leadership.
My heart breaks for the incarcerated female transgender people who are having their identity erased, and are now forced into male prisons. When things calm down, I’d love to read an analysis of why people voted for Trump? Was it the price of eggs? Do we scapegoat the chickens?
Pay no attention to the people who judge you. Deal with the real-life consequences of their agenda, but never, ever blame yourself. It’s not personal.
We’re all afraid of where this shift in power is taking us. But it’s just as important that we not scapegoat others, or allow them to blame us. Transgender people have done nothing wrong.
I think there should have been more thought given by national LGBTQ organizations about pushing personal pronouns at a time when people were feeling overwhelmed. I also wish we’d taken time to properly educate cisgender people (“What’s that?” “It’s a stupid word.”) about the meaning of growing up transgender. That’s on us for feeling nothing could stop this train.
I encouraged Anthony to change course and embrace his skills as a children’s songwriter and storyteller. He got excited and happy to be freed of the guilt heaped upon him.
When friends begin scapegoating others, I try to listen and try to have my better self not join in the stone throwing. I am clearly not without guilt for fearfully and angrily coming up with judgments of my own.
Brian McNaught's new memoir, “A Prince of a Boy,” is available on Amazon.
