Growing up queer in a religious household, YES Institute executive director Joseph Zolobczuk said he needed help navigating difficult conversations with loved ones.

“At YES Institute, I found some of our communication and education work which really helped me have the conversations with my parents and also deal with all of their questions,” Zolobczuk said.

What started as an intern position with YES at just 18 years old has evolved into a 27-year career where Zolobczuk now holds a director role.

“It's really just an honor and a privilege to get to help other families on their journey, just like I got to experience with my family,” he said.

YES Institute is a suicide prevention organization that carries out its work through gender and orientation education.

While many may hear those words and assume YES only helps LGBTQ people, Zolobczuk said the organization focuses on “everyone in America.”

“If you present yourself as a man and want to be seen as a man, there are a lot of expectations that come with that,” he said. “We have lots of statistics that men don't seek mental health resources when they're in distress, because we say, ‘Man up, tough it out.’”

Gender expectations raise important questions about how people’s treatment of one another reflects the society they live in, according to Zolobczuk.

“If we look at the disparities of gun violence and school shootings, there are heavy expectations just to be seen and recognized as male in our society,” Zolobczuk said. “And men are not the problem, because we can look at other countries, and they don't have the statistics of male mental health crisis, loneliness epidemic, drug abuse or incarceration rates nearly like we do here in the U.S.”

Though the institute is a “small but mighty” nonprofit run on donations and word of mouth, its reach is still commendable.

Zolobczuk said YES reached 6,000-6,500 people per year pre-pandemic through outreach opportunities like courses, presentations and educational and workplace trainings, and all sessions are available in English, Spanish and Haitian Creole.

Those numbers dropped slightly post-pandemic, but YES still reached over 5,000 people last year.

Zolobczuk said many people reach out to YES after a presentation and ask for help or advice with a personal issue, which in turn gives the organization the opportunity to connect with community members on a deeper level.

The most effective way YES carries out its work is by connecting with parents and adults because they are “the caretakers of our youth.”

Some adults have only learned about gender and orientation through anti-gay slurs, Zolobczuk said, so their lack of acceptance derives from fear.

“[Many parents] want to love their kids, and oftentimes they're just very afraid finding out that now their child is in a marginalized group and in our society,” he said. “So their questioning of ‘Maybe you're not gay’ or ‘Maybe you're not trans’ comes from this terror of discrimination.”

YES invites parents and adults to ask tough questions in its workshops without the fear that they may not be “politically correct.” This way, it creates a judgment-free zone for them to work through their concerns directly at its source.

“If we can return families to [understanding], ‘Look, this is your kid, and can we figure out how your love and relationship for one another is so much more valuable than worrying about the expectations of the world?’” he said. “If we can get there in a session, I think we're moving towards a better place.”

And Zolobczuk has seen that impact play out firsthand.

A Haitian-American mother struggled to cope when her child came out as trans. She went through a crisis of faith, understanding of gender and how to be a good mom. Her child began volunteering with the YES Institute and eventually brought their mom to a course.

The mom eventually came back for more courses, and over time began to understand gender, orientation and, most importantly, her child. Zolobczuk said the mother wrote a book about her experiences and cited the YES Institute in it, which was one way he was able to see the org’s direct impact.

When asked about a time he realized the work he was doing was all worthwhile, Zolobczuk’s answer was simple: “Every single day.”

“Every day we get to do a referral, we get to support a family, we get to connect a dad with another dad that was kind of suffering in shame and silence. It's every day that we get reminded why this work exists, the need for it, and also the continued passion to keep doing this work.”