Few milestones carry the weight and sparkle of a Silver Jubilee.
For Velvet Lenore, the reigning Mizz OutSFL, Sept. 28, marked 25 years of motherhood. Born in Georgia and raised in Florida, Lenore has found that her real home and greatest love of all is with her husband Michael and their extended family presently 122 members strong.
“The instinct to be a mother came naturally to me. I have four sisters and one brother. I knew that I wanted to start my own family when the time was right,” Lenore said. “In the eyes of some, my large family may seem a bit unconventional, but I live my life by my own standards. I have no time for naysayers and bigots.”
Lenore once experienced homelessness, and that lived reality continues to shape the compassion and determination she brings to her role as a drag mother today.
“I was blessed with the ability to open my heart and my home to those in need. I had worked as a nanny when I was younger, so I knew that motherhood was in my DNA. Many of our children were abandoned by their biological parents or society for a host of reasons including being part of the LGBTQ community,” Lenore said. “When you have nowhere to go, nothing to eat, and no one who cares about you, you do what you have to do to survive. I was homeless once myself for an extended period of time. I was determined to make sure that our children would have a true family and a safe and nonjudgmental place to call home.”
When it comes to counting her blessings, Lenore never fails to include the evening she met the legendary female illusionist and LGBTQ activist Melissa St. John. The iconic St. John has been part fairy godmother and drag mother to Lenore over the years. She has also added the title of grandmother or the more royal moniker of glam mother (OUTSFL named St. John its Queen of Queens in 2024) thanks to members of Lenore’s multi-talented clan.
“Momma (St. John) taught me to always perform from the heart, to never hold back when I am on stage and to always do my best. She also made sure that I understood the importance of being humble,” Lenore said. “As bright as Melissa St. John’s star shines, she is always kind, always welcoming, and always willing to help those in need. She has taught me so many things that I needed to learn and in turn, I have passed on this knowledge to my own children as a drag mother myself.”
Without question, show biz is in Lenore’s blood. Lenore herself found early success when she won the Showstopper National Dance Competition. She followed that up with her association with Ballet Florida and the venerable Alvin Ailey American Dance Theater in New York City.
A consummate performer, Lenore knows a thing or two about drama. Family dynamics can sometimes be challenging, but Lenore has learned to navigate the ups and downs of being the matriarch of a large family.
“To be clear, I am not trying to go all third person here, but if I look at the persona of Velvet Lenore, I see Velvet the entertainer. She is larger than life and has an outgoing personality. However, that is an image I have cultivated over the years,” Lenore said. “While Velvet the Mom is always ready to listen and understand. Respecting the voice of each family member and truly listening to their words helps to open hearts and not close doors.”
Before summing up her approach to motherhood, Lenore paused to reflect on what truly matters day to day.
“Simply put, it’s just being there for your kids for whatever they need. I try to provide the right mix of support, advice, love and an unlimited amount of hugs when needed. Just like with any family, it is important to address issues and not let them fester,” Lenore said. “I deal with each of our children differently. It really depends on the situation. I am grateful to have a steadying influence in our home when it comes to my husband. He is always understanding with our kids and very easy going, but neither of us is afraid to dispense some tough love when necessary.”
She then shifted the focus from discipline at home to the deeper values that guide her family.
“Children and young adults need structure in their lives to be successful. But first and foremost, at least in my opinion, they need to feel safe and loved. Our family motto is: One Family, Many Hearts,” Lenore said. “We encourage our children to respect themselves and to pursue their dreams. While not an original quote and certainly borrowed, I always like to say, it is not what you go through, it is how you come out of it.”
For many of Lenore’s children, coming out was the moment they set out to find their own family ties. No two stories are exactly the same, but somehow many of these struggling young adults found their way to Lenore’s doorstep. Once invited inside, they have become part of a family that accepts them for who they are on the inside as well as the outside.
Holidays are a big tradition in the Lenore household. All are welcome. No one has to go hungry or be alone. Again, it’s part of being part of a family.
“Thanksgiving is always a big event at our house. We invite anyone who does not have a place to go for the holidays. There can be anywhere between 50 to 70 people in attendance. I cook for two days and of course my husband helps. Some of my specialties include turkey chili, homemade chicken noodle soup, collard greens, mac & cheese, a variety of seafood dishes, a delicious sweet potato casserole, potato salad and a perfectly prepared turkey. My caramel cake for dessert tops off the meal,” Lenore said.
According to Lenore, the best part of being a Mom is the love she gets to give and receive in return from her kids.
“My greatest wish for all of our children is that they find someone who will love them unconditionally for who they are. I want them to fulfill their dreams and become the stars that they were born to be,” Lenore said.
Lenore’s commitment to family through good times and those moments that are more challenging has allowed her to grow in ways she never thought possible when she looks back over the years of her storied career.
“I love performing, but what is more important to me is being where I am needed and being able to help whenever I can,” Lenore said.
For Velvet Lenore, family is the greatest stage — and love is always the star.
Velvet Lenore and her husband Michael are always available to help LGBTQ youth in need. Staunch supporters of the Compass Community Center, SunServe and Kids in Distress, they encourage those in crisis in Palm Beach County to contact the Compass Community Center in Lake Worth Beach at 561-533-9699. Help in Broward County is available by calling Covenant House Florida at 954-561-5559; Kids in Distress, Inc. (KID) at 954-390-7654; Pride Center at Equality Park at 954-463-9005 and SunServe at 954-764-5150.
